Geez! I never thought the mental aspect of all of this training would weigh more on me than the physical aspect. Perhaps it’s just my hypochondriac self that is petrified of injuring myself before the big day. After all, the most important part of this whole thing is to get to the starting line happy, healthy and injury free, right?
But I just can’t help but to compare myself to others. That’s life – we all do it at one time or another. I feel that for a virgin marathoner, I’m doing pretty darn good with my training given that my peak mileage so far have been in the low to mid 30’s over the past few weeks. My long run coming up this weekend is 16 miles….not too shabby with 11 weeks to go before the big day. Okay….”go me!”. But then all the unanswered questions and vindictive phrases start bubbling up from deep within my psyche….
The devil in me:
- are you really giving it your all during your mid week workouts?
- this training day calls for hill intervals – using the AMT for hills doesn’t count!
- come on slowpoke .. get those legs turning faster!
- do you REALLY think that 4:20 is a realistic goal? the rate you’re going you’ll be lucky to finish in under 5:00!
- you’re tired after 2 miles? get with the program! on 11/6 you’ll have 24.2 more to go!
- MY GOD you are SLOW!!!!!!
The angel in me:
- keep up the good work! you really gave it your all last night….it’s okay to be tired at the gym less than 12 hours later
- this is your FIRST marathon after all, no need to get your Nike Tempos in a wad because you’re not going “fast enough”
- take it easy on yourself, you’re not skipping any workouts and you’re making modifications to prevent overuse injuries
- trust your training! All will be well on 11/6 and you’ll have a fantastic time no matter what!
This sounds so absurd, but I’m afraid I’m going to be disappointed on marathon day if I don’t finish in under 4:30. I’m being dumb right? I’m putting too much pressure on myself 😦
I just want to be good at this!